4 com

Ski Bums

(I forgot to post this on Monday. I re-read it and desperately want to edit, but I’m not allowing myself. Pictures added today.)

The kids are on Spring Break this week and I am READY. Tons of plans in the works, starting with taking them skiing today. Peter took off the day from work and we left super early.

We saw some beautiful bison on the way up. Gorgeous creatures.

I’m sitting in the lodge at Loveland watching Team Provost take on the mountain. So so so sweet! Bittersweet, actually. (I’ll explain in a minute) Peter is snowboarding and the kids are skiing for the first time. They’re naturals! I love it and am kicking myself for not getting them on skis sooner. (although judging from Peter’s sporadic texts send from the slopes, it sounds like my little Finn is getting pissed easily. He’s a perfectionist and if he’s not perfect at something the first time, he doesn’t want to do it.)

Skiing2011 009

I haven’t taken them skiing sooner because we just didn’t make it a priority. Or “I” didn’t make it a priority. (I don’t know how it is in your house but if this mama doesn’t plan shit, nothing gets done.)

I loathe being cold. Loathe it. My hands and feet freeze, as does my nose. I’m not talking the usual “I’m skiing. it’s a little brisk.” No. It’s serious business. I know I’ve mentioned it before that I have Raynaud’s Syndrome, but people have no idea what that means.

My hands, feet and nose get so cold, I can’t feel them. My college gal pals used to call them “dead hands.” They go bluish white and numb. The numbness could go on for hours, even after I go inside. Sometimes it’s just a few fingers. Then they get red and hot and hurt, until they finally calm down to a normal temperature. It fucking sucks. I’m not a wimp. I can’t “buck up.” There are no magical gloves that will keep this from happening. (Believe me, my dad and I tried every single pair at REI when I was younger and would go ski.) When we got here today, while renting boots and skis, I actually had the familiar sinking, panicky feeling I got when I used to ski. I had to tell myself “Oh no, lady. You’re not going. You have hot tea, your laptop, magazines and a Larabar waiting for you in the warmth.”

I tried to buck up so I could go get some pictures of them starting out. But that didn’t last long. I actually had to run inside because after being outside for 20 minutes, it had started and I couldn’t feel my feet, hands or nose.

Keep in mind, it is SPRING here in Colorado. It’s like 45 degrees and BEAUTIFUL. A bit windy, but beautiful. There’s no way I could be up here in the winter.

Before you ask, yes I had on enough clothes. Yes, I was wearing wool socks and boots. Yes, I was wearing the warmest mittens you can buy. Yes, I was wearing a scarf and hat. Yes to all of the questions you might ask me yourself and that I have been asked a million times. Nothing helps but getting out of the cold.

I’m a little pissed today because I wish I didn’t have an ailment where this happens. (I’ve been in stores before where if the air is too cold, it’ll happen.) Not to even mention the beautiful sun which is SHINING. No sun for lupus girl. No cold weather for lupus girl.

While buying tickets for Peter and the kids, the guy behind the counter said “Where’s your gear? What’s wrong with you? Get on the mountain!”

I smiled and said something about needing to catch up on some reading but the truth is I kind of wanted to cry. Yes, another instance where I look like nothing is wrong with me. (I know I know, I should feel grateful that it’s not something worse. And that I have two legs, etc but this is my pity party so just shut it for one second.)

(sidebar: Even though I overshare quite frequently, I pride myself on NOT being that jackass who says “Yeah, I can’t ski because I have lupus and Raynaud's syndrome and blah blah blah. I was at Target the other day and said to the checker “Hey, how are you?” and she said, in a VERY leading manner “Well, I’m FANTASTIC!!!!!!!!”

“Fantastic? You never hear that. That’s great.” I said.

“Well, today is my birthday and I’m very lucky to be alive.” she said looking at me dramatically.

I hate leading statements.

She wants me to ask why she’s lucky to be alive.

I’m not going to.

Because you know what?

I could answer “Guess what, asshole? ME TOO!”

I didn’t say anything. She finished checking me out and tried her gimmick on the next victim customer.)

But today, I’m pissed because I’m not out there with the rest of my team taking on the day.

End of pity party.

On the plus side, my hair looks really good and I’m not wearing uncomfortable ski boots. Those things are brutal.

More pics of the blue eyed devils on the mountain!

Skiing2011 035Skiing2011 036

Skiing2011 058

Skiing2011 031

Read more »
1 com

Thursday Loves

Sister and I were having one of daily chats when we started talking about whether we’re introverts or extroverts. I know people see me as an extrovert, and I am, but I’m also quite an introvert. Meg said ‘You’re an extroverted introvert”, you get energy by being alone to fuel your extroverted-ness.”

I like that.

So, now just as I envision a car filling up with gas when I’m eating really well, I now do the same when I’m alone. (I’m all about visualization.)

Peter is in Seattle until tomorrow and while I miss his sweet beardy face and can’t wait to hug and squeeze him, there is something to be said for having time apart. (He works from home and is in a tie with my brother, A, as the loudest talker in all of the land.)

He arrives home tomorrow on the day our sweet rare bird turns 9. NINE. As in, I have a 9 year old daughter. As in, my nine year old is a total tween. WHA? Oh sweet Lady Jane. Where did the years go? I’m hoping she is a late bloomer and continues her love of all things creepy, arty and eccentric. The mean girls swarm but so far HJ has been immune to it. Shine on, you crazy diamond.

Here are some things that are making me love life:

  • TWO of my girlfriends are having twins. It’s has been so exciting thinking about it and anticipating the arrival of four new, fantastic humans. And I often find myself in AWE of these women with TWO babies wriggling around in their wombs. GAWD.
  • Almond butter on banana. Perfection.
  • the weather here in CO the last few days. Unbelievable soul and mood fuel. 65 and SUNNY. It makes me miss the 1976 CJ7 Jeep I drove in my teens. That car was perfect for days like these.
  • Boulder Veggie bowl with gluten free teriyaki and brown rice at Tokyo Joe’s. Mmmmm…serious goodness.
  • Coming Clean…Things I never told my parents made me laugh out loud. It reminded of a time when my Dad and I went out to breakfast when I was about 22. We were laughing reminiscing. For some reason I decided to tell him that one day in high school when they thought I was at school, we had really driven to Taos. He wanted to be pissed but he couldn’t. We laughed and laughed. (The really hilarious part of the story is that I called, like a good daughter, and said that I was at A’s house and A’s phone wasn’t working so I would talk to them the next day. (um, good one, dumbass) My dad said “Nah. You can come home tonight. Be here by 7pm.  You did not say “no” to Roger.  It was like Noon or something so I knew I had to hustle. (we ditched school to drive to New Mexico that morning) So, I freak out and A and I drive from Taos home to Denver in totally shitty weather. (Meanwhile, the only money I had was my parent’s Phillips 66 gas card. Serious dumbass) When I get home, ready for all hell to break loose, my parents WEREN’T EVEN HOME. They had gone to a dinner party!  Jerkfaces. My Dad thought THAT was hilarious.
  • Sharpening pencils. There is something oddly meditative about it.
  • My bed, or as I now call it, “the command center.” 

nathan_coley_01      

  • love this pic by Nathan Coley
Read more »
0 com

Artsy Fartsy

I volunteer once a week at the kid’s school in the art room. I want to make sure that in addition to helping in the classroom with academics, the brilliance of art programs don’t get ignored.

The art teacher, Mrs. O, rules, of course. She’s young, creative, interesting, smart and artistic. (duh) I do whatever she needs me to do and I so look forward to it. For one, there aren’t any children there when I volunteer. (Bonus!) They are at lunch. So it’s quiet and deliciously meditative. Mrs. O goes to lunch too, so we chat for a bit, she tells me what she needs done, and then she leaves. I put on my iPod and get to work. It’s deeply satisfying being in a room that is swirling with imaginative energy and fantastical creations. I’ll have to bring my camera next time. It’s badass.

Last month, when I was in the room, Mrs. O told me that she selected Hadley to participate in an art show. Accordingly, we made a huge deal about it at home, as it is a big deal. Rare Bird’s first art show. One of many, I’m sure.

All of the work is being shown at a local mall for a week. We went on Saturday to check it out.

February 2011 052February 2011 053

They are allowed to create whatever they want during art class. Hadley made a dog and a mouse out of old ribbon rolls.

February 2011 057

Here’s Finn dutifully posing. While looking at all of the other art, he said something profound like “This sucks. Can we go to the toy store?”

So we did.

At the toy store, Peter found the game KinderBunnies and immediately grabbed it. Apparently, he has played the adult version, KillerBunnies, and wanted to try the kid version out. I’m down with anything that gets us spending time together and gets the kids thinking.

The game is really fun and the kids LOVED it. I’m sure adding to the fun of the game was the fact that Peter and I agreed to play the game in the fort the kids built. We also agreed to eat take out for dinner in the fort. (note: Peter, aka Old Man River, was not pleased about sitting on the floor. He made it known and had trouble walking when he got up.)

While it was a bit of a pain in the ass, it was SO novel that the kids were freaking out and squealing with delight. I kept leaning over to Peter saying “This is fun. We’re fun parents, right? Say this is fun. They’ll remember this, right? And think we were fun, right? I mean while they are talking to their therapist about something else we screwed up….”

+++

My cleanse ended on Monday and while I was a bit sad, because I like structure, I just realized I can continue to eat this way. So I am! Modified, of course. Vegetarian flirting with Veganism. Trying to avoid gluten and dairy because it makes lupus happier. I am allowing sugar back onto the scene and I welcomed her with HUGE open arms. We did have to have a heart to heart though about her controlling ways.

It’s 65 and sunny here. Just try to ruin my mood.

XO

Read more »
1 com

Thursday Loves…

  • My massage this morning. This aching bod thanks you magical J!
  • Taking myself out to lunch, alone.
  • Thinking about this recipe CONSTANTLY. Must make SOON. It had me at “cake batter.”

 

  • Thinking about Morning Glory muffins CONSTANTLY too (are you sensing a trend? sweets anyone?)
  • Family dance party to Supertramp last night. Then a yoga session with Finn while Peter and Hadley jammed on the piano to REO Speedwagon’s “Can’t Stop Loving You”. THEN, Finn fell asleep while I laid with him listening to Peter, Paul and Mommy. Oh, music. The love affair is stronger than ever.
  • I supremely dig being a part of my favorite foursome. Tis an honor.
  • Wheatgrass shots first thing in the morning
  • A stack of delicious new magazines
  • Going to the dentist. I would go once a month if I could.
  • Colorado weather the past few days. GORGE!
  • Reading all about NY Fashion Week and perusing collections. I love clothes but hate shopping. Explain that to me.
  • Seeing great friends from out of town + their new babe
  • Reading creative vegan blogs and feeling inspired to cook
  • B for leaving a slice of vegan chocolate tart on my doorstep today (!) 

Happy early weekend, turtle doves.

Read more »
1 com

Funk Removal

Have been in a funk for a few days. Today I decided to do something about it.

These things in combination seemed to have done the trick.

  • Find a good vegan soup recipe for dinner so I don’t have to eat the same motherscratching brown rice and veggies.
  • Noon yoga class with a righteous instructor
  • stroll through Vitamin Cottage grabbing some groceries, including the prettiest strawberries I have seen in a long time, roasted pumpkin seeds and frozen wheatgrass shots.
  • Drive home with the windows and sunroof open, taking in the amazing Colorado day.
  • Listen to CD made YEARS ago by KBDK, which contains a good amount of classic rock and hippie jams. (Widespread, Phish, Grateful Dead…)
  • Windows still open. Volume up embarrassingly loud.
  • Pull into the driveway with a smile on my face and then proceed to take 2 shots of wheatgrass and eat strawberries over the sink.

Mission accomplished. Funk removed.

It’s day 16 of the cleanse, people. Uh huh. I’m feeling pretty badass. Not supremely badass as there have been bumps in the road. Like this morning when I emailed B and was like “TALK ME DOWN FROM THE LEDGE. SCREW THIS!”

But still, maybe a little bad ass.

Good job, body. You’re doing swell.

On a TV front, are you watching Portlandia, yet? Mkay. Get on that. Although, don’t repeat lines to Peter and laugh hysterically because he’ll just look at you blankly. Also, I know I’m totally late for the party but FRINGE? Hello, fantastic. I’m deep into Season 1. I’m also going to acquire Friday Night Lights. After all of the hullaballoo everyone makes about it, the shit better change my life. Kidding. Sort of.

Wishing you wonderful Tuesday.

Read more »
0 com

Thursday Loves

  • Music – specifically Cat Stevens, Tennis, Fleetwood Mac, The Weepies
  • Feeling light and zippy (yup, I just said “zippy”)
  • brunches and lunches with people I love
  • Daydreaming about vacations
  • my sister’s post about her recent vacation to Tulum
  • Oliver spooning with me at night under the covers like a nursing infant.
  • RuPaul’s Drag Race
  • Feeling grateful. Every day.
  • The look on Peter’s face when I gave him a snow blower for his birthday
  • This girl’s photostream on Flickr. That blue hair is perfection. I love the shot called “WINTER.”
  • Planning a baby shower and HJ’s birthday party. FUN! The fun part for me is the invites and choosing where to have it. (Baby shower = French restaurant, bday party = funky art workshop for kids) Then I just delegate. It’s too stressful for me any other way.
  • Still alive and cleansing like a mofo. It’s Day 4 and I’ve had some minor missteps along the way but I’m being decidedly chill about it. This isn’t about self-flagellation. It’s about learning what works for my body and about being healthier.

I will say that I’m much more of a juice kind of girl. I love that vibrant green!

Yesterday morning I decided to make a smoothie. I put in some romaine, raspberries, an avocado, a cucumber and some coconut water. It looked so beautiful before I turned on my mighty Vita Mix. After that it was just brown sludge. I literally choked it down. And I was sad because I LOVE all of the ingredients. It tasted pretty good but I just couldn’t get past the texture and color of it.

I feel really really good though. My stomach issues have been non-existent since I started. I don’t know if I can attribute that to the cleanse or the fact that I also started taking Probiotics. Either way, it’s fabulous. Lupus has been relatively quiet as well. Big ups to my friend B, who is kicking arse as well!

Happy almost weekend to you, sweet people of the interwebs.

Read more »
3 com

Crazy Sexy Cleanse

Tuesday and Wednesday were “snow days” for my children. There was only an inch of snow on the ground but it was below freezing and deemed too dangerous.

So, they were home.

And annoying.

I missed yoga on Tuesday and lunch with two lovely ladies on Wednesday. Not to mention getting nothing done, having the house trashed and them squawking at me ALL day about being bored.

Have I mentioned that I love them. Mmhmmm, I do. I really really do. (There were some cute moments: H&F playing American Girl dolls, the many many skits they performed, making cookies with them while we sang Fleetwood Mac songs…)

I’m just happier than a pig in shit that they are back in school and the house is still and quiet.

The irony is I have to volunteer at school today.

Just.Can’t.Get.Away.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Moving on.

Have you ever heard of Kris Carr? Chances are, you’ve seen her face lately because she’s been all over the place promoting her new book Crazy Sexy Diet.

This is what she says about herself:

I’m Kris Carr, best-selling author, motivational speaker and wellness coach. Back in 2003, I directed and starred in Crazy Sexy Cancer, an inspirational documentary for TLC that chronicled my journey from cancer diagnosis to juicy healthy living. I also wrote Crazy Sexy Cancer Tips and Crazy Sexy Cancer Survivor, two must-have manuals for triumphing over disease and embracing a holistic approach to recovery. My wake-up call encouraged me to make a total lifestyle upgrade inside and out. This extraordinary journey led me to crank the stress down and the joy factor up. It brought me back to nature, the garden and the people (and animals!) who fuel my spirit each day. In the process, I created a blueprint for a healthy and happy life and I want to share my secrets with fabulous you!

Love love love her. She’s beyond positive, funny, irreverent and smart. Qualities I love in a girl. Plus, what she says makes sense. She still has a very rare, incurable form of cancer, but it isn’t progressing. And she feels great.

I remember discovering her documentary shortly after I was diagnosed with lupus. So much of what she said resonated but I was lazy and it was too much for me at the time to change my lifestyle so drastically. (Um, 5 week old baby, 2 year old, just moved to a city I’d never been to before?…yeah, I’d call that overwhelmed) She wrote her first book after the documentary came out called “Crazy Sexy Cancer Tips”. I thought, and this is the freaky part,  “Hm, if I ever got cancer, that would be a really good book for me to read.”

Mkay.

My mistake was just thinking that this lifestyle (I really hate the word ‘diet’) was only for people with cancer.

I’m ready now. To try at least.

I’ve been tinkering for a while, trying to eat mostly meat free (aside from briefly becoming a porketarian in Mexico), juicing, yoga, dry brushing, supplements, tons of water, etc. But this is going to be tough. It’s also gluten free, sugar free, caffeine free, alcohol free. Oy. I’m a bit terrified but excited too.

Just so we’re clear, it’s not to lose weight. It’s to feel good. Or at least better. This way of eating has long been described as “anti-inflammatory.” I SHOULD be eating this way to help my body heal.

It’s only 21 days. Starting Monday. I’m doing it with my friend B, my most fantastic across the street neighbor, who, if you remember, was my partner in Mastectomy Madness. Yes, we both dealt with the breast cancer/double mastectomy bullshit a month apart. We share a plastic surgeon. She’s the greatest. She is a vegan already and a runner, so we’re going to keep each other in line.

We’ve already started weaning. It’s not that hard, except for my morning cup of tea, and SWEETS! Argh. I can’t seem to shake those. I swear, after 5 or 6pm, I become possessed and must eat any and all sweets.

I’m not going to be a psycho about this cleanse and I am anticipating some icky days, but I’m committing. And blogging about it holds me to it. I promise I won’t bore you with all of the details.

Off to juice. Wish me luck!

Read more »